Un golden nugget important, din ultimele zile.
S-a format ascultand Osho, si contemplandu-ma.
Intai sa citez din „Osho – The art of dying”,
pasajele esentiale pentru epifanie :
CONSCIOUSNESS has two dimensions:
one is that of having
and the other is that of being.
And there are only two categories of human beings:
one who is struggling hard to have more and more,
and one who has understood the futility of it and has changed their life into the other direction, the direction of being.
These people are trying to know who they are.
In the world of having you only believe that you have something, but really you don’t have anything.
You come alone empty-handed and you go alone empty-handed.
And all that happens in-between is almost like a dream.
It appears to be true, while it is there it appears to be real, but once it is gone then you understand that nothing was really happening.
The reality has remained untouched by your dreaming.
The world of having is nothing but a world of dreaming.
The religious person is one who has become aware of the futility of it all.
You cannot have anything except yourself.
And all that you have, except yourself, is a deception. It is an illusion.
And, in fact, that which you have possesses you more than you possess it.
The possessor finally becomes the possessed.
So the first thing to be understood is that these are the two doors: having, being.
If you are still lost in the dream of having, you are in the world.
You may be sitting in a cave in the Himalayas, that makes no difference – the world is still there because the world is in the very desire to possess.
Only one thing can be possessed and that you already have with you – your own self, your own consciousness.
But to have that being one has to work hard.
You cannot get to it easily.
First you will have to detach yourself from the world of having.
That will be almost like a death
because that’s where you have got identified – you are your car, your house; you are your bank balance.
And when you start awakening out of this dream you start feeling as if you are disappearing because all your old identities start disappearing.
One identity disappears, one part of you disappears.
There is emptiness left behind.
When all your identities disappear
and simply you are left,
there is only pure space
as pure as life,
as pure as death.
Nothing else is there.
That is your being.
Only that being can be possessed because it is already there.
You can possess only that which is already there, you cannot possess anything else. All desiring is desiring for the futile.
It leads only into frustration.
The really religious person is one who has become aware of the futility of desiring, of the impossibility of having anything here in this world or thereafter in the other world.
You can only possess yourself.
You can only be the master of your own being.
And it is hard work, there is no shortcut to it;
Acid, drugs, are not going to help you there.
That is very cheap, it is very cunning.
It is a chemical deception.
You want to get into the world of your innermost being without any effort.
It is a dishonesty.
Without earning it you want to possess it.
The drug trip is the latest invention of the cunningness of the human mind.
Just by taking a tablet or injecting a certain chemical into your body you think you can become a Buddha, you think you can attain to that total possession of your being.
You will simply become a slave of the chemical, not the master of your being.
…by and by you will see that there are a few moments when you also move into the dimension of being.
These moments are the moments of beauty, the moments of happiness.
In fact, whenever you see that you are feeling very happy, you have come in contact with the dimension of being – because there is no other happiness possible.
But if you don’t observe it accurately, you will misunderstand it.
You are sitting with a woman you love,
or with a man you love,
or with a friend,
and suddenly you feel a deep well-being arising in you,
a deep joy – for no reason at all, for no visible cause.
Then you start finding causes outside:
you think maybe it is because the woman is sitting by your side
and she loves you so much.
Or it is because you have met the friend after so many years.
Or it is because the full moon is so beautiful.
You will start finding causes.
Maybe the woman you loved functioned as a situation, as a jumping-board,
and you jumped into yourself.
But it is difficult to jump into yourself when there is some antagonism outside.
You have to be outside then.
But when somebody loves you,
you can drop all defense measures,
you can drop all your strategies,
you can drop your politics,
you can drop your diplomacy.
When somebody loves you,
you can be vulnerable;
you can trust that he or she is not going to take advantage of you,
that you can be defenceless and you will not be killed and crushed,
that you can be defenceless and the presence of your friend will be soothing,
it will not be poisoning you.
Whenever there is a situation where you can leave yourself defenceless
and you can drop your strategies and your armours,
suddenly you are in contact with your being
you have moved from the dimension of having to the dimension of being.
Whenever it happens, there is happiness, there is joy, there is rejoicing.
Even if it is only for a split second, suddenly the doors of heaven are open.
But again and again you lose it
because you are not aware.
It happens only accidentally.
Remember, a religious person is one who has understood this accidental happening and who has understood the innermost key of it.
And now he does not move into his dimension of being only accidentally,
he has the key
and whenever he wants to move, he opens the door, he unlocks the door and goes into it.
This is the only difference.
In ordinary happiness and the happiness of a religious person,
the only difference is this:
that the religious person has become capable of moving any time, any place, into his being.
Now he knows the direct route and he does not depend on outside props.
You depend too much on outside props.
Sometimes you are in a beautiful house; it feels good.
You are travelling in a beautiful car – the car is humming and everything is going beautifully – it feels good.
In that feeling you start coming closer to your being.
But you misunderstand;
you think it is because of this car, so you have to possess this car.
Maybe the car functioned as a situation, but the car is not the cause.
Maybe a beautiful house functioned as a situation, but it is not the cause.
you think it is the cause then you move into the world of having;
then you must have the most beautiful car – you have to have it.
Then you have to have the best house,
you have to have the best garden,
you have to have the best woman and the best man.
And you go on collecting and collecting and collecting
and one day suddenly you recognize or realize that your whole life has been a wastage.
You have collected much but you have lost all sources of happiness.
You got lost in collecting things.
The basic logic was that with whatever you felt good and happy, that thing had to be possessed.
Listen to me…that thing need not be possessed.
You just watch what is happening inside you
and you can start having that happening without any outside help.
That’s what a sannyasin does.
It is not that you have to have all,
that you have to possess all,
but you have to remain alert that you cannot possess ANYTHING in this world.
All that you possess can function only as a situation
it is not the cause.
The cause is inside.
And you can open the door without any outside prop,
at any time,
in any place,
and you can go in and you can rejoice.
You are no longer attached.
You can use things, they are useful….
I am not against things, remember.
but don’t believe that things can cause you happiness.
Use things, they have a utility,
but don’t believe that they are the goals.
They are not the ends, they are only the means.
The goal is within you,
and the goal is such that
one can move directly into it without any outside help.
Once you know it, you become a master of your being.
Foarte descriptiv si powerful, cel putin pentru mine, acum, in momentul asta.
Foarte largi ramificatiile, implicatiile.
Dar o sa ma rezum la epifanie.
Pana acum, Imi era evident in mare parte, dar se pare, cam abstract.
Cu cat Te duci mai aproape de centru (deci Te apropii de Being)
=> creste calm, creste happy, creste meaningfulness, creste sens, cresc culorile, etc
Si, cu cat Te duci mai departe de centru (deci spre lumea fizica, Having)
=> creste stress, creste frica, cu distanta devine teroare, scade sensul, scade culoarea, etc
Deci, distanta fata de centru, determina motorul esential, calm sau stress.
Restul lucrurilor sunt destin dupa aceea.
Dar, acum, a intrat in schema posesiunea.
Which makes sense.
add 1, add 1, add 1, add 1, etc
Nu stiam cauza in schimb,
si mereu M-am intrebat:
„Mey, ok, toata lumea vrea sa aiba, dar de ce? Este clar o pacaleala aici”
si nu puteam sa pun degetul exact pe cauza
Acum s-a clarificat.
Dintr-un motiv sau altul (ca sa nu o iau pe cai super filosofice)
sa zicem din neatentie,
s-a format o credinta, un belief,
Ca trebuie posedat lucrul in prezenta caruia erai happy, cand erai happy, cand a aparut un moment de happy
Este logic, toata lumea vrea sa fie happy.
Si daca cumva crezi ca X iti da happy => normal ca vrei continuu, vrei sa fie disponibil mereu, ca sa te mentina happy, gen mancare.
Trebuie sa adaugi deci multe,
fiecare lucru care ti-a dat happy,
care te face sa te simti bine.
Bine, toata lumea stie ca dupa un timp anume,
dispare sentimentul de bine care ti-l da lucrul respectiv,
cel putin devine neutru, dispare de pe harta,
daca nu devine chiar negativ, se transfoma in scarba, si ura.
vizualizam procesul asta de distantare si apropiere fata de centru.
Gen, un cerc, care se mareste, se micsoreaza.
Si vezi clar ca
expansiunea este nastere,
iar contractia este moarte.
Expansiunea este add, adunare, posesiune, identificare, lacomie.
Contractia este sub, scadere, detasare, dezidentificare, frica.
(Ca mica paranteza, lacomia apare din ciclurile urmatoare, nu din prima.
Gen „sa nu cumva sa se mai intample vreodata sa ajung la 0”)
Si apoi observam frica.
E clar ca se bazeaza pe tensiune.
Asta Mi-am demonstrat.
Distanta => tensiune => frica.
Dar in acelasi timp, trebuie adunare, trebuie expansiune.
Ca sa fie distanta.
Altfel nu are cum sa apara nici o frica, nu poti percepe nici o frica.
Dar atunci? de ce Ne-ar fi frica de moarte?
De ce este curentul asta de frica, aparent de moarte, care il vad?
Pentru ca nu are sens, logic.
Nu pentru Mine cel putin.
Moartea Ne duce spre centru, unde este +
Si apoi a venit inca o mini epifanie.
Nu este frica de moarte!
Este frica de a pierde!
Fear of loss!
Frica nu are legatura cu interiorul,
Frica nu are legatura cu nici un proces care favorizeaza interiorul
(moartea de exemplu, sau meditatia, sau somnul, sau calmul, sau etc)
Frica are legatura cu pierderea a ceea ce ai acumulat!
Frica are legatura cu durerea care o simti cand vezi ca strangi din gheare, dar tot pierzi, tot scapa.
cand depui tot efortul posibil
sa nu pierzi, si tii strans, sa nu o dai, sa nu o pierzi,
dar tot vezi ca pleaca, tot vezi ca o pierzi,
deci vezi ca nu ai control.
Si URASTI! Hate!
Asa se leaga si controlul.
Oricum controlul este legat de posesiune, de dorinta initiala de a poseda, de a aduna.
Frica nu este de moarte.
Moartea e ok, ba chiar este misto daca privesti procesul.
Frica este de durere,
frica este de durerea cand pierzi,
frica este de durerea cand Ti se confirma clar ca nu controlezi obiectul ala,
frica este de pierdere a tot ce ai acumulat pana acum.
(acum este evident de ce evita oamenii meditatia, somnul, moartea, calmul, nu?)
Si frica, durerea, ura, frustrarea, sunt destinul posesivitatii, destinul acumularii.
Frica, durerea, ura, frustrarea sunt inevitabile.
Acum este clar, indiferent ce teatru joaca cei care fac pe durii si desteptii, este clar ca sunt terorizati, si de aceea compenseaza.
Incearca sa evite subiectul, realitatea.
Gen „daca ii conving pe altii, poate ma coving si ei pe mine, ca nu imi este frica, si nici nu va urma durere”
Urmatoarea Mea intrebare, automata, a fost: „ok, si se poate deci expansiune fara efectele negative?”
Da, logic ca se poate, se vede si in citatele zise de osho.
Use those things, foloseste, dar nu Te atasa, nu poseda.
Si pentru ca egoul nu poate sa nu se ataseze, sa nu posede,
normal ca in momentul cand „folosesti” fara sa Fii atasat si identificat cu lucrul respectiv,
atunci este God in ecuatie, full option.
Este expansiunea naturala, expansiunea frumoasa, viata frumoasa, cand se intampla perfect, exact asa cum trebuie.
Frumusetea aia adanca, pe care nici un om nu o poate crea.
Mozart si Michelangelo sunt God in action.
Nu efort, nu stiinta, nu ego, nu maimuta umana.
Dar nu se poate intampla Mozart prin Tine, daca vrei sa posezi creatia.
Posedand, asa Te departezi de Centru, de God, de Interior, de Lege.
Iar dezlipirea, dezidentificarea, efortul de a evita posesiunea, posesivitatea,
moartea in general,
nu are cum sa fie doar o data, la 100 de ani.
Procesul se intampla la orice nivel, mic sau mare.
Iar egoul favorizeaza adunarea, acumularea.
Chiar si o epifanie, care acum in momentul asta, este spirituala, ok,
va deveni amintire, va deveni acumulare, in minte, in ego.
Trebuie sa Avem grija non stop sa Ne dezlipim non stop.
Nu o data, si gata:
„Gata! M-am iluminat! Acum ma duc sa … „… sa ce?
Trebuie sa Ne scuturam non stop de acumulari,
Si trebuie non stop sa monitorizam nivelul de acumulari.
Trebuie daca vrem sa Fim Happy, pentru ca altfel nu trebuie, logic.
Si, cireasa de pe tort cu citatele din Osho, a fost clarificarea,
clara si simpla,
diferentierea clara si simpla intre cele doua dimensiuni.